Hodge Podge

which could potentially be really awful depending on who actually reads my blog.

Just random recap of my weeks here since the last post.

Today, I saw a couple having an argument in the middle of campus. The woman was in tears and loudly groaning and occasionally slapping her partner. And of course the first thought in my head was, "Just break up! Just break up! Break up!" Then I realized how insensitive I was being. They're probably in the process of breaking up, and I remember how hard something like that is, so then I mentally chided myself. And the second thing I thought about was why they would be having such a private conversation in such a seemingly public place. Then I remembered that maybe a public courtyard is more private than doing it in your dorm room, since nearly everyone lives in a dorm room with at least 5 other people. That's right people. 6 people to a room! 3 sets of bunk beds, and that's pretty much it. I don't know how they do it. And every day I feel that lucky to have my own bedroom and bathroom.

It happened, for the second time. I started laughing in the middle of teaching. Today it happened in reading class, when I got really excited about telling the students about Left Eye (from TLC) and her fire incident. The article we were reading was about why some people start fires on purpose. The first time I cracked up in class was a few weeks ago when I was teaching my writing class at the Tsinghua campus. Now you have to keep in mind, I teach writing to three sets of students. Usually, the students are done with classes at 3:20 pm. But once a week (for a set of students, twice a week), they have to stay an hour later, and take my class. So you can imagine how antsy they are in my class. During this one period in particular, the kids were all over the place, would not listen, just stared off, whispered to each other, and it was just too ridiculous. I think sometimes students don't realize the view teachers have of the classroom. I'm standing at the front of the class! I see you sleeping/staring/talking! And they act soooo surprised when I call on them when I know they're not paying attention. At one point the whole situation was too funny, I was just in complete disbelief and had to just start laughing in class. I don't think anyone else knew why. I tried to hide behind my book, but it was just too strong.

I've got this horrible sore throat. I'm not sick just yet, but I'm sure it's coming. I've been screaming a lot. Not yelling at the students. Just projecting like crazy. Reasons. 1. The acoustics in some of the classrooms are horrible. Just echo like mad. 2. Sometimes I get really annoyed at the students not paying attention, so for some stupid reason I just think, well if I talk louder then they won't be able to sleep! 3. Talking louder helps my pronunciation, at least I think it does. It's a lot easier to do the clear-talking, patronizing, enunciation when you're half-way screaming. I can't help myself. I don't think the students notice though. I think they just think I'm trying to be really clear. (I have gotten compliments on my pronunciation. GO California accent! P.S. I'm the only teacher here from California).

Sometimes I think I'm an awful teacher. I have reached that level of impatience where I've resorted to singling out and embarrassing the students who don't listen. Common technique. I'm at the front of the class talking. Student A is obviously not paying attention. Student A is outrightly talking to another student while I'm talking. Whoa, major disrespect. What makes me more evil is that while this is happening I'm thinking, "Student A, what the hell do you think you're doing talking while I'm talking. Of all the damn people in the class, you of all people should be paying attention," while I mock their inability to speak English properly in my head.

Then I call on the student. I ask, "Student A, question question question." Silence. Again, "Student A, question question question." Still silence. "Student A, question question question." (If you haven't noticed, I'm a big fan of repeating myself 15 times). Then I step up the assholish-ness to a brand new level. "Student A, do you know the answer?" Silence. "No?" Silence, occasional shaking of the head. "Why don't you know the answer?" "You don't know the answer because you were talking, while I was talking. (Imagine lots and lots of pausing and nodding while I'm saying this) Why are you at this school? Why are you learning English? If you actually want to learn English, then you need to pay attention in class, RIGHT? You can speak Chinese anytime you want after class, but when you are in class, you need to speak in English, OKAY?" Then I continue on with my patronizing slow teacher-speak for the rest of class. And I feel so awful that I have to just look at the rest of the class and only look back at Student A occasionally. And at the end of class, I feel absolutely exhausted and drained and like a big fat meanie, which I am. And that is why I deserve to have a sore throat right now. But seriously? You'd be surprised how many students fall right back asleep/go right back to not paying attention right after I called them out on their shit.

Oh Wendy and your procrastinating, slow to change ways. I finally cleaned up the pile of laundry that has been sitting on my floor for the past 2 weeks. ie. I re-hung all my dirty clothes because I'm too lazy to actually do laundry. I think few people would guess this about me, but I'm actually really disgusting. For the past 2-3 weeks, I had been wearing worn dirty socks, every day, because I didn't want to do laundry (in my defense, laundry is a major pain here in China, since there are no dryers. And the washing machines here really suck and everything comes out with lint all over it). But yeah, I still need to sweep up all the dust and hair that has accumulated over the past few weeks. This morning a woman knocked on my door and asked me if I wanted a cleaning service (since our dorm building doubles as a hotel, and I think I'm living in one of the designated "hotel" rooms, so she probably got mixed up that morning), but I said no because I was too embarrassed about my room (and cuz I was in a rush).

I'm thinking about getting into astrology. Completely out of character I know. But something about this non-sense kinda intrigues me. I'm a cancer. Cancers are apparently really emotional, sensitive, clingy, social and reserved, full of contradictions, procrastinators. I would say all those are true about me except for the clingy part. But then again, I know that this zodiac stuff is written to fit practically everyone, and people always only pick out the points that are accurate to focus on. But yeah, still fun.

I've kinda sorta been drinking a lot of Long Island Iced Teas. That's not really healthy. Granted it's a step up from my previous drink of choice (vodka redbull), but yeah, that's not saying much as far as my class/taste level.

Oh yeah, I got a massage two weeks ago, and it pretty much felt like someone beat up my back. It was awesome. And I was majorly sore afterwards.

And I went shopping with some of my students this past weekend. It was fun, but exhausting. We went at 8:30 in the morning on a Saturday! By choice (of course not mine, but still.. their choice!).

Also, today I discovered this awesome chicken lettuce sandwich type thing here. A sandwich!? The thing I've been craving. It's kinda a cross between a pita and a burger sandwich. They slice fatty roast chicken off a skewer, mix it up with lettuce and onions and douse it in sauce. They stuff it into a round pita bun. And we eat directly from the plastic bag. Golden.

Hey everyone! I got a new niece! I am now the aunt to 2 nephews and 2 nieces! And for anyone that missed the memo, I'm going to Mexico in May of 2008. Puerto Vallarta and maybe (probably) L.A.